| Valentines! |
[15 Feb 2009|11:29pm] |
I had a very busy valentines.
I went to the art museum in Minneapolis with my aunt, uncle, and cousin.
There was a lot of penis art work by this artist, I forget his name, but it was awesome because I love drawing penis'. lol. I always get in trouble in school for doing it. I bought these inscents in uptown Minneapolis and they're called fizzy pop. They're all blue and glittery it's so cute. I bought some really big ear rings at aldo at mall of america too. I got a lot of great stuff thanks to my auntie. & I watched the movie Factory Girl, life changing!
I can't believe I never knew about edie sedgwick. andy warhol is a dick, definitly.
So any ways, I'm really glad that I met Dave.
A few months ago, it must have been sometime in September, I was at the mall and I saw some guy, I didnt really think anything of it. I always see guys at the mall. But then a week or two later i was looking through myspace and I saw his profile so I messaged him and we started talking.
I wasnt expecting anything, maybe just to hang out.
& we did.
& wow no I'm just like, I dont know not in love.
But you know when you meet someone, and you get that feeling where you think they might change your life? That's kind of it.
=]
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[29 Nov 2008|11:03pm] |
Ouch.
My tonsils are so swollen right now from purging.
It was one session but I got up a lot.
& I like stabbed my throat with my nail.
It hurts like a bitch.
But Yea, I'm going on the treadmill tomorrow for sure!
Need to get down in weight.
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[16 Nov 2008|06:36pm] |
Blah, back to starving.
I swear if I binge, I'm just gonna kill myself.
Well probly not.
But I will do something crazy.
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[12 Nov 2008|07:31pm] |
I'm scared.
I keep eating, even when I see how much higher the scale gets weekly.
My life is falling apart.
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[05 Oct 2008|04:13pm] |
Holy Fuck
I havent had my computer for a MONTH
&& I'm at my highest weight EVER!
I have never been this heavy and its really scary.
=[
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| Yuck |
[30 Aug 2008|03:00am] |
I wanna be perfect.
I need it.
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[21 Aug 2008|03:18am] |
I will never ever be good enough.
If I controlled my eating I would maybe be worth something.
Maybe I'd have more friends.
Maybe life would be less miserable.
I need to take control.
I'm so disgusting. ='[
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[19 Aug 2008|04:37pm] |
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I'm too heart broken to get out of bed.
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| Weight unknown. |
[17 Aug 2008|09:31am] |
I'll weigh myself tomorrow morning && post my weight.
I just got done dyeing my hair.
I'm attempting to go blonde.
I'll post piccys of what it looks like as of right now.
I'm thinking I'm gonna have to dye it 2 more times before it's blonde. =[
Only my roots turned blonde.
Anyways, I'm hanging out with Shane in exactly 1 week & 5 days.
1 week & 5 days to lose 11 lbs.
I'll keep my journal updated on the progress.
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| 181lbs. |
[16 Aug 2008|06:20am] |
Awesome.
& my goal was and still is to lose 12lbs by the 25th. So far I've lost 7.5lbs. & I still have 9 days to reach my goal. I'm so glad.
I'm walking around the lake today & doing 300 crunches. I don't care if I get shakey again.
An hour before I go work out I'm going to have 3 or 4 egg whites. & a salad with light dressing. So that I dont get shakey.
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| 184.5 |
[14 Aug 2008|05:51pm] |
Uh. I fasted yesterday & it's 5:51pm right now & I havent ate yet.
I'm probly gonna either have a salad or an apple with lots of water.
Oh && *drools*
haha.
I love her.
&& people that read this probly like her, righttt? =]
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| 187.5 as of this morning. =/ |
[13 Aug 2008|02:47pm] |
I'm like obsessed.
She is so pretty.
I'm kind of hopeful right now.
Not about my eating & stuff.
But about a guy.
& finally finding one who isnt an asshole.
=]
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[14 Jul 2008|03:20am] |
I want blonde hair so bad, but my mom is being lame about it. =[
Hopefully if I can get a hold of my dad.
I was in texas for a whole week and I didnt get the chance to hang out with him. It sucks really bad because I havent seen him in 3 years. & I don't know when I will be going back to texas. Anyways, I completed a whole day without fasting. I'm not proud or anything, I dont think one day is much of an accomplishment. I think 3 days is something to be proud of. I'm only fasting for 2 days though. & then I'm gonna restrict to 300 calories. Then I will switch it up from 300-800 calories for awhile. I'm gonna start doing a lot of crunches & hopefully walking around the lake, or just walking in general would be great. I really miss amanda. I hate sabrina so much for what she did. Hopefully amanda comes to town tomorrow... i really need my hair straightner and purse. its getting annoying.
Here is some thinspo for anyone who actually reads this. =]
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[21 May 2008|09:52am] |
So ecstacy isn't what I thought it'd be...
I will probly try it again.
I just need to be with the right people this time.
& hmm. Finally I got my period. I basically skipped my period. Now I have it again. After a month of pmsing I'm glad it's over. Well in a week I should be back to normal. Today I am going to eat a chocolate chip muffin. There is a lot of calories in it. *sigh*
A plus side, I have decided to start working out again. So today when I get home I might take a shower then go around the lake, then get home & take another shower. Either way I am walking around the lake. I'm listening to Ashlee Simpson's new album & I like it a lot. I can't believe she is married... she's so young. I'm glad she is in love. I want to be in love! Well I am in love. It's just that the person doesnt feel the same anymore. It's the worst when you know that there was a time when they loved you. ugh. I miss you, boy. 2 months ago we were so in love, what happened?
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| I'm gonna stop being a pussy |
[11 May 2008|05:12am] |
who wants to fast monday- friday?!
I'm doing it either way.
Just thought it'd be cool to have someone to do it with.
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[06 May 2008|11:54pm] |
Today sucked.
how did your day go?
I want to know what everyone else ate.
=]
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[05 May 2008|03:19pm] |
Eisley concert was awesome.
Stacey && Sherri are adorable.
Sherri is soooo nice,
so is stacy.
but sherri is more out going.
i look up to both of them so much.
sherri is so tiny too.
she looks underweight.
I felt so fat next to her.
But anyway.
Yea the show was soooo awesome.
Their merch guy tryed ripping me off though.
I was so drunk. He thought I wouldnt notice.
But I actually did.
grrr.
lol.
I'm fasting today....
I ate so many calories yesterday.
I had 2 really big meals.
fast food.
I hope I'm down tomorrow....
I have to be 170 by Friday.
I know I can.
If I'm not it just means I wasnt trying hard enough.
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| dfjsdfkljsf |
[02 May 2008|06:24pm] |
| [ |
music |
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I'm a fake - The Used |
] |
It's raining today.
That ruins the weekend, totally.
Today I have had some of my sister's chocolate bar, some of a pizza slice(purged it), some fries (purged that), a small apple for breakfast. && I think that might be it... I feel like I ate more. & I've had 2 diet dr.peppers. yup.
I should be down a pound tomorrow!
Yay. Go me.
Doing 300 crunches tonight.
& also next weekend I am going to go buy the hair dye & some bleach. I tryed dyeing my hair red a few days ago but the black dye in my hair wouldnt allow it. So now I have kind of red roots. But the rest is still black. I was so pissed off. But yea. It's a new goal for me. No red hair till I am 170lbs. & I still have another week untill I dye it. So that's enough time to lose 10lbs. Well actually as of this morning I am 183.5lbs. But I know I will be under 180 by Monday. I hate my ednos. It drives me crazy. D=
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